Log in

No account? Create an account
21 December 2004 @ 11:30 pm
Dead or Alive: Overdose  

What Mortal Kombat did for blood in the "way back when" days, Dead or Alive now does for breasts. With the latest installment, the series has officially realized the ultimate in "Gainax Effect" research: breasts that are just shy of having their own gravitational pull.

There are countless silly ninja outfits (including a "princess ninja" complete with a jeweled tiara for Kasumi), and lots of pointless yet kickass floaty ninja scarves. The graphics dudes and dudettes have "texture" down pat, and the finest example of their efforts is Zack's (now with Flashy +5) alien suit. It has a shiny ass that reflects the entire environment.

The levels are beautiful. I hate fire, but the Grand Opera stage is one of my favorites. The only way it could possibly be improved is if I could fight my way through the burning seats after watching my opponent being nailed flat by falling columns.

A lot of the stages have a new "feature" (or at least, something I don't remember in previous games) where you can knock your enemy down a flight of stairs, or get your own ass rolled down 'em. It seems to me that the programmers are really proud of their ability to make the body roll naturally, so much so that you can fall almost all the way down the Great Wall of China. I like to "use my environment to the maximum," in order to damage my opponent, but sheesh!


The series sells itself on surface beauty only, and so Ultimate follows easily in its predecessor's footsteps without bringing much new to the table. It's a solid game, but grabbing innovations are lacking (and the characters' facial expressions are as dead as ever).

This game was designed, programmed, and made for men, and as a result, the focus is on fighting, breasts, and female underwear. It's tradition for any Dead or Alive game to have more bounce than brains, but Ultimate takes it to a point where it's flippin' ridiculous. It's a wonder that the female cast doesn't take damage from the backlash of their own breasts! I am told that if you enter your age as 99, you can increase the breast bounce factor. Unfortunately, this gimmick does not work in reverse.

Another bad joke is this: each girl gets an "X-Box" outfit, with the X-Box logo emblazoned most boldly in neon green on her (bikini style) panties. Since each skirt is endowed with the remarkable ability to flip itself upward at any given moment, we have the Ultimate in product placement.

I can handle cheese if it is equally distributed, but Ultimate is leaving me hanging. I am downright annoyed that you can change Kasumi's underwear in any number of ways without putting any effort into it, because I still haven't found the secret to unlocking Ryu Hayabusa in his sexy underpants!
Current Mood: crankycranky
Auturgist: Ryu Hayabusaauturgist on December 22nd, 2004 07:24 am (UTC)
You are being way too harsh on the game. It's really not all about the breasts (though Team Ninja certainly delivers in that regard for fans).

For starters, the gameplay maintains the same control scheme and relative simplicity of the series, meaning button mashers can still enjoy it. However, it's definitely more balanced in the way of counters; the new four-point counter system makes counters more difficult to execute in order to balance the amount of damage they do.

Secondly, it really is the best-looking fighting game ever made. The levels are gorgeous, the characters look awesome and move naturally (well, for the most part), and the lighting and reflection effects are insane! The game is eye candy if nothing else...

Thirdly, playing it online is awesome. I really don't play very many video games currently, but I'll still sometimes load it to fuck around online awhile.

Lastly, you have to accept that some of the costumes are fanservice, but there are plenty that aren't skimpy at all, including some of my personal favorites. My absolute favorite costume is Lei-Fang's #15 costume, the black/grey panda hoodie and pleated skirt with thigh highs. It's so adorable! ^_^

I do agree with you, though... it would have been cool if Team Ninja had included some skimpy costumes for the guys. Ryu Hayabusa is hot! ^_^
One Who Wanders: oh yeahabiona on December 22nd, 2004 12:57 pm (UTC)
Don't get me wrong ... I really do agree that it's a damn fine lookin' game. I'm just sad that "damn fine looking" is really all it can be for me.

For me, it just feels really brainless. I will never be able to memorize the key sequence for the best moves (I'm half button-masher, half theorist), and I tend to get pissy when I get my ass kicked multiple times running (damn you hard mode ... damn you!). Sometimes it seems that part of the game is luck latching onto me ... my character's falter will jive just right with the other character's blows, and I'll just get smacked around for an entire round.

So, I look for other things to distract myself with, and there's only so long I can stare at The Grand Opera or Zack's alien suit.

I've got a bad collector's streak, but Ultimate doesn't quite satisfy it. The manual doesn't explain why you collect randomass shit in Survival mode (which hasn't stopped me from collecting randomass shit in Survival mode, mind you). I like unlocking new costumes, but given my average amount of skill and the fact that you must play over and over and over again to watch the same credits time and time again, Ultimate can become an incredibly painful experience.

I lack an online connection with the family X-box. I think I'm afraid of my fellow players, anyhoo ... I can work really hard, and they'd still easily kick my pansy ass and laugh about it. ._.; Happens all the time at Gaming Night ... x_x

I accept fanservice, I really do. I just want to be equally served, goddammit. XD;
One Who Wanders: failureabiona on December 22nd, 2004 01:03 pm (UTC)
I just want them to take "damn fine" to the next level. Let's stop working on how to change Kasumi's panties and figure out how to give the characters facial expression. XD;
Auturgist: Ryu Hayabusaauturgist on December 22nd, 2004 02:25 pm (UTC)
Well, if you do get onto Live at some point, my Xbox Live gamertag is (predictably) "SD Bishounen". I'll totally help you out while we play, not that I'm amazing at the game, but I'm decent. ^_^;;
One Who Wanders: can't let goabiona on December 22nd, 2004 01:02 pm (UTC)
And, I miss Christie. ;_; Damn I was kickass with the poking technique ...
silence_glaive on December 23rd, 2004 02:05 am (UTC)
Don't miss Christie, she'll be in 4. Since DOA-U is a remake of 2, it is lacking a couple of characters. But, I will agree that there is no reason for Kasumi to be wearing a skirt, since it only covers her about 10% of the time.

I still <3 Helena though.
LionBoogylionboogy on December 23rd, 2004 11:15 am (UTC)
Anne in an X-Box printed bikini. I'd go for that. OH YEAH. hahaha I love you, Anne. hehehehe