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20 March 2002 @ 05:38 pm
Yesterday and today, I've been having this sensation that I have no right to be depressed. o_o Am I really, even? And if I am, does a pill so tiny that if I dropped it I would lose it ... can such a thing fix it? Or ... am I really being mended by this? Perhaps it's something like in the movie Harvey, where what would make him acceptable to everyone else would ruin what makes him him ... dunno. o_o
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: ... silence
Kain aka That Evil Guynanikore on March 20th, 2002 04:09 pm (UTC)
little chemicals in your brain could mean the difference between you being you right now and you being stir crazy and not having the slightest clue of what you're doing.
Gilliam: Gillygilliamii on March 20th, 2002 10:53 pm (UTC)
Well, I think that while some things are chemically.......caused (?).........some of it also has to do with your outlook on things and the way you think. I find that just by approaching people with a smile on my face at work makes a very big difference in both the way that I "sell" and their receptiveness (did I just invent a word?) to other things.

a_for_anonymous on March 21st, 2002 10:46 am (UTC)
While identity is always an issue when dealing with behaviour-altering drugs of any kind, I'd say the bigger issue here is the causes. Over here, the psychoanalysis industry (especially it's practices when operating in America) is subject to a lot of both scepticism and criticism, and to be honest, I can see why. We've had many discussions on your feelings and their possible causes... and to be honest, Sakaki, the only way I can see that they could POSSIBLY be resolved is to destroy (or solve) those problems at their roots. While taking little chemicals into your body may make you feel better inside, it's the same principle as weed, ecstacy or alcohol use - when it wears off, the problems are still there.
Your medication has been prescribed in such a manner that you NEVER go on the post-drug 'downer'... but thinking about it, feeling better about something doesn't solve it.
I'm sorry to be so negative and opinionated about this, but it's my honest standpoint - right now, a lack of direction and possibly purpose, and people expecting too much of you seem to be your main problems. The only way, in my opinion, that these problems are going to be solved is if someone - not necessarily you, but someone - sorts them out.
Although... taking medication may give you the persistance to achieve this, I guess... but in my opinion, don't think about it too much, don't let yourself become dependant on it in the long term.