March 24th, 2002

work, dirty job, erk, working

(no subject)

My eyes burn, burn, burn ...

I did mucho reading tonight, as I suddenly realized that I'm expected to be much farther along in both books for these classes than I thought I was supposed to be. That much doesn't bother me, I enjoy reading, and these are good books. Oddly enough, I've actually been to where one of these books is set ... even performing in a specific little place they mentioned off-hand in one paragraph. I have about a hundred pages left to read for Tuesday in order to catch up. That's not bad. The response I'm supposed to do on it worries me, though. The paper I gotta rewrite for tomorrow worries me more. I haven't started yet. I don't even know what the hell I'm going to write about.

I wish I had a more comfortable spot to read in this damn room. ::misses her loft::

It was interesting today, searching the Internet. Suddenly I felt as though I had done all I could do and there was nothing more to be done - with a calm sense of loss I went over many bookmarks and lurked through many communities, but felt no better. It was disturbing to the extent that much of my contact with others is via the Internet - if I have nothing that draws me to it, and I leave ... I will be, for the most part, isolated. Fzzzt.

Speaking of the Internet, I finally finished Hammerspace's new look and even gave it a new url (the sudden onslaught of three to five popups at Dencity scared me off ...):

I guess that'll do for now. I was about to submit this site to this webring thing, but I don't think I'm good enough. People will never link to it, never want to see it. It's a pity, because the site looks cute at least. o_o Oh well. Next I need to work on .:!Brainfuzz!:. ...

My real-life journal hasn't had an entry since the 13th. Everything in there is either bits of analysis or expressions of fear and anxiety. Whoo.

I had a moment today where I sat there scolding myself for being stupid. lol

I wonder where Nair is ... she said she'd be online, but I haven't seen hide nor hair of her. I hope she's sleeping ... she needs to ... but she probably isn't. She is much stronger than I.

So many people are so irritating ...

I have to come up with another reason why I'm here since I didn't get accepted into JMS. My mother suggests our second reason, the availability of study abroad, or something like that. But I don't believe in that. I'm too much of a dork ... and I'd love to visit some Asian country, but I would hate not being able to communicate. I'm such a monolingual American. -_-

Maybe I'll start my essay at midnight. I was going to start at ten but I was reading. lo and behold the water is now fine for consumption, which is good because although they placed "free drinkable water" at stragetic spots around campus, they forgot or failed to supply enough cups.
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