Ask me anything within the limits of decency. While I will do my best to fully answer your query, I reserve the right to be evasive.
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Here's a picture of Earl Grey.
I was carrying a fairly full glass of water through the dim entryway when he leapt out of that nowhere that cats can find anywhere. He scared the hell out of me, which caused me to reflexively jump backwards, and as a result, I dumped a good amount of the liquid on myself and the floor. I bet Earl Grey is downstairs somewhere right now, snickering to himself.