One Who Wanders (abiona) wrote,
One Who Wanders
abiona

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I did not sleep well last night. Over and over again I woke up and tossed and turned, waiting to fall back asleep ... I hope that this is not a return of the former state of things. The more this happens, the more tired I am, the more easily stressed I become, and the more I am stressed, the more I wake up in my sleep or do not sleep well, and the more I grind my teeth (it is during this type of time that I wake up with blood on my pillow).





what am i doing online? i am much more fit for pen and paper journals.

what is my inner journaling service?

(brought you by april)




I've felt guilty lately about having a "new top-secret screenname" which very few people know. I feel like I should give everyone on my old buddylist the chance to contact me if they wished, but I really don't want some of them contacting me. It's not that I hate them or despise them, but I just don't have anything to talk about with them anymore (like a lot of former AGVers), and it makes me feel disconnected and quite uncomfortable. Is this why Cx didn't give me his screenname back then? I feel like such a hypocrite ... when I am blocked by people, I am invariably hurt or confused. I haven't blocked anyone with the block button, but I have blocked them by not giving them the knowledge of this new name. I want some people to leave me alone, but I can't tell them that, so I make almost everyone distant.

I feel like such an awful person. -_- Maybe when I'm forty I'll be wise.

And for those people who thought the habit of including real-life footage in the RK OAVs was a bit odd, check out the RK TV series ending "It's Gonna Rain." The inspirations for the artistic decisions they made in the OAVs can all be traced to the TV series, methinks.
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